The Twenty-Seventh Annual African Hippopotamus Race written by Morris Lurie and illustrated by Elizabeth Honey. Page 35 original text:

Below them, stretched the mighty Zamboola River.
It was just the way it appeared on the map, with the swamp at one end, the waterfall at the other, and, in between, twenty-two kilometres of deep, wide river.

Patterned Writing:

In front of them, stood the exciting Ginninderra Village,…………

It was just the way it was every time, with the birds singing, the candy shop with the big bubble gum and giant lollipop, an indoor and outdoor café with fruit juice and milk shake for us to drink. (child yr 3)

All around us, flowed the beautiful Canberra Floriade Festival.

It was just the way it appeared on the map, with the purple hyacinths at one end, the yellow tulips on the opposite side, and, in between, gorgeous flower beds.
(child yr 2)

Straight in front of me, stood my messy bedroom. It was just the way my sister and I kept it, with the top bunk bed at one end, the bottom bunk at the other, and, in between, lots of room to play.
(child yr 2)

The Ducks and the Fox
Reasons for selecting the text for writing:
" to study the narrative/fable format
" to use the traditional fable characters of a small, weak but clver hero (the two ducks) and a strong but wicked villain (the fox)
" to give the animal characters human qualities
" to use speech to give information
" to describe the characters by:
a) telling what they do
b) telling what they look like
c) using old fashioned words, such as, 'accustomed to it', 'gentlemanly'; and
d) using persuasive words, such as, 'lovely ladies'
" to use precise words, such as, 'waddling, flopped'
" to use speech marks

The Ducks and the Fox

Writing Plan p. 5
1. sisters

2. road

3. pond

4. swim

5. "road,"

6. sister,

7. "change,

8. route."

Fables - Arnold Lobel -The Ducks and the Fox - p. 5
Original Text

Two duck sisters were waddling down the road to the pond for their morning swim.
"This is a good road," said the first sister, "but I think, just for a change, we should find another route. There are many other roads that lead to the pond."
"No," said the second sister, "I do not agree. I really do not want to try a new way. This road makes me feel comfortable. I am accustomed to it."
One morning the Ducks met a Fox sitting on a fence along the road.
"Good evening, ladies," said the Fox. On your way to the pond, I suppose?"
"Oh, yes," said the sisters, "we come along here every day."
"Interesting," said the Fox with a toothy smile.
When the sun came up the next morning, the first sister said, "We are sure to meet the Fox again if we go our usual way. I did not like his looks. Today is the day we must find another road!"
"You are being just plain silly," said the second sister.
"That Fox smiled at us. He seemed most gentlemanly."
The two Ducks waddled down the same road to the pond. There was the Fox sitting on the fence. This time he carried a sack.
"Lovely ladies," said the Fox. "I was expecting you. I am glad that you have not disappointed me."
Opening his sack, he jumped upon them.
The sisters quacked and screamed. They flapped and flopped their wings. They flew home and bolted their door.
The next morning, the two Ducks did not go out.
They rested at home to quiet their nerves. On the following day they carefully searched for a new and different road. They found one, and it took them safely to the pond.

The Ducks and the Fox

Patterned Writing - Example

The Bantam Hens and the Feral Cat
Two spotty but dainty eyed Bantam sisters were ambling along a dirt track to the far paddock to find some delicious grubs for their lunch.
"This is a pretty good road," said the first sister, "but I think just for a change we should find another way."
"No," said the second Bantam sister, "I do not think so. I really do not want to try a new way. This way makes me feel safe. I am used to it."
One morning the hens met a feral cat sitting on a stump on the edge of the dirt track.
"Hello hens," said the farmer, "I'm guessing you come along here every day."
"Of course," said the hens, "every day, even Monday."
"Interesting said the feral cat.
When the sun came up the next morning, the first sister said, "We are sure to meet that feral cat again if we go our usual way. I did not like his looks. Today is the day that we must find another road!"
"You are being just plain silly," said the second sister.
That feral cat smiled at us. He seemed most gentlemanly."
The two hens strolled down the same track to the far paddock.
This time the feral cat came up close to the sisters and wrapped his claws around them. The hens squawked and scratched the feral cat with their sharp claws. They ran home and locked their doors and windows. The next day they found a new way.

The Ducks and the Fox - Independent Write - Example

The Hens and the Crazy Farmer

There was once four little silky chickens, two boys and two girls and they were all best friends. Every day at one o'clock they went past a farm to the compost heap to get some grubs for their lunch.
One day when they were passing the farm they met a crazy farmer.
"Hello yummy things! Oops! No! I mean hello silkies," said the farmer.
"Hello farmer," said the chickens and they went on.
Next morning the girls said, "We think that that crazy farmer wants to eat us."
"Nonsense," said the boys.
"Well you can go the same way but we are going to find another way," said the girls and off they all went.
The boys were eaten by the farmer and the girls lived happily ever after.

The Ducks and the Fox - Independent Write - Example

The Two White Mice
Every night before midnight two white mice ran out into the kitchen before the kitchen cat could catch them. The two mice stole some cheese from the kitchen.
One day they met a fox. The two white mice said, "What are you doing in here?"
"I am a friend of your mothers,' said the fox.
"Really," said the two white mice, "we have never seen you before."
With that he jumped upon them. Then the two white mice ran away. The two white mice found a better kitchen.

from The March of Mother Duck by Colin Thiele. Original Text.

There was a creek before the playground - long curving stream, with little gentle waterfalls, and leaves floating, and rocks that were wet with the trickle and a splash from the bumpy waterfall. There were two ducks on the muddy bank, and willows blowing in the wind, lovely to see. And in the mud there was slippery moss - little islands of green slime that were like a sponge. The ducks jumped in and swam around in circles and then floated down the river together.
But down by the stepping stones there were little chunks of oil and orange and yellow pollution near the sides of the rocks.

Patterned Writing: Our Trip To Ginninderra Creek - Latham

On Wednesday my class walked to Ginninderra Creek to study the water, plants and animals. On the way we saw a flock of pink and grey galahs huddled together eating seeds in the grass.
When we arrived at the long curving stream we explored the steep slippery banks and drew what we saw. Mrs Graetz took photographs to show us what camera words do.
Before recess we saw little gentle waterfalls with leaves floating, and rocks that were wet with the trickle and the splash from the bumpy waterfall. In the still water it was as smooth as a mirror that sparkled like a wishing well when the rocks hit it.
When we had recess we sat on the dry grassy hill under the straight and grey gum trees and ate our play lunch. There was a greyish brown grasshopper that camouflaged in the dry brown leaves - it jumped between us.
At the end of recess we saw two ducks that were different shades of brown - dark brown, light brown and cream on the muddy bank. They jumped in and swam around in circles and then floated down the creek together.
After recess we walked to the eleven stepping stones - big squares of cement with little pebbles on top. There were willow blowing in the wind and tall grasses with fluffy seeds, lovely to see. And on the muddy bank there was slippery moss - little islands of green slime that were like sponges.
But in the creek there were little chunks of oil and orange and yellow pollution near the sides of the rocks. And a big box of rubbish on the bank.
When we walked back to school we were tired but happy because we had so much fun! We cleaned up the rubbish in our play ground so it was lovely to see - as lovely as a long curving stream with willow blowing in the wind.

The Black Duck by Eleanor Nilsson was read in grade 2/3
Original Text:The summer passed and Squeak Toy grew steadily bigger. Gradually her little downy feathers fell out and were replaced with shiny brown and buff ones. And she got the lovely green strip on her wing that the older wild ducks have. She still liked here little pool but sometimes Tom took her down to the day. He found that when he pulled out the grass for his boat races she searched in the roots for worms and for the black millipedes that fell off and lay coiled up like watch springs in the red dust.

Independent writing successfully uses much of the structure of the original and makes the same kind of language choices. Kierryn from grade 2 was particularly successful in his choice of words.

Swooping season came and Whitey grew very big, and his grey downy feathers were peppered throughout the land and were replaced with black and white feathers like an old photograph. And he got the lovely white strip on his back that the older wild magpies have. He found that when he sat under the gum tree for lunch Whitey searched in the grass for lizards that crawled across the land and stood silent like a rock.